Friday, November 11, 2005 @10:17 PM
-effects of boredom-
OP is finally OVER! yes. PW days are OVER! lalalalala
i got into OGL, but i'm not exactly happy or sad about it. i know i should be grateful that i got selected while there are people who are so disappointed that they didn't make it. i'm sad because my friends didn't make it and yes, i'm not someone who can be very ra-ra with fellow mates i'm unfamiliar with. but. i'll try to adapt. i'm also sad because the time when we get to really interact with fellow ogls will be the OGL camp which i am not able to attend. quite a pity and that's why when i was asked about my enthusiasm towards being a ogl during the interview, i just gave a 7/10. but it's too late to moan about it. SO! i shall take it with an open mind. things won't be that bad. i still have gen, the ahreders and many other friends. i think what is more important is getting to know my OG! that is the only part i'm looking forward to. that makes the orientation week so interesting. muahaha
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there are many sides of seeyun and seeyun is clearly informed of this.
i know i tend to show different seeyuns to different people in different scenerios. some people see me as a quiet girl who doesn't open up easily (or is it just me who feels this way ^^) while most people, esp my closer friends, see me as a bubbly (i get this ALOT), chatty, enthu girl. and there's this other side that is not known and i would rather kept it reserved. some of you might know but i rather keep this side of me a secret. but i would admit that i tend to have my quiet side when i need to think or study. i get very irritated when someone talks to me when i'm trying to study.
but there's one thing of me that remains the same despite such spliting personalities: i am very much human-oriented. i treasure friendships alot and can be quite sentimental/sensitive. i didn't throw away any postcards, little notes, cards given to me by my friends. and occassionally, i will take out my pri sch autograph book to read and laugh off those innocent times i used to have. i know there are many friendships that i created but fade off along with time.
two particular groups of people i would like to acknowledge. the irony is i know them the longest. and if we had continue meeting up, i'll probably be very good friends with them, like i used to be. maybe some of you belonging to these groups are reading my blog right now. you should know who you are, esp if i haven't been in contact with you for long. well, i know i haven't been trying to maintain the strong friendships that we used to once have. or simply, work has tied us down so tightly that 'hanging out with you guys' just become impossible.
EXCUSES!! seeyun is coming up with lame/unacceptable excuses.
but i would want to let them know that while despite not being in contact, occassionally, i will read your blogs, read your friendster testimonials, or just hearing rumours on how you guys are getting along with life.
yeah, just to want to let you know that you have never been forgotten by seeyun. it's just circumstances.
i know why the friendship stale and i know that it's mostly my fault. believing in him was or is still a big challenge for me. i don't want to trust him for the sake of trusting, cos everyone trusts him and it's only right if i do the same thing. i don't want. this is not just physically trusting or convincing yourself into trusting. i would rather believe in him through mistakes i made, through this rebellion nature of seeyun. i know deep down inside my heart, he is the one, but the devil me refuse to concede defeat. let her explore, be in distress, and finally understand. hmm, this post is so sad. i should liven it.
shout-outs!
AC046, i want to see christmas decorations. we need to go out for lunch/dinner/movie. our ppt was right: some people are just so busy.. haha. ehem.band.ehem.choir.ehem.SEAgamer.ehem.
bonnie, jo: we need our sleepover SOON. are you sure you want to wait till the late week of dec? that's like the week to rush our holiday hw!
a2gang: we need to catch up again. liz, our plan to hitch a bar. the eksi one sounds really cool. we should try it out one day.
there's another group that i wish we can meet up again but it's really hard cos there are 15 people. the patton mates. should be quite interesting if we can organize an outing. maybe i should try.
-i need to shop!-