Sunday, October 23, 2005 @9:19 AM
this post is merely about people in GENERAL. no targets or personal attacks (:Yesterday set me to think about my year in acjc. i love the hanging out sessions with my mg besties. the conversations shared, though always light-hearted and humourous, often led me reflecting about the various incidents and my own experience in ac. maybe it's the fact that you hear different experiences from your long-time friend in a different jc. it came upon me that i'm actually very fortunate to be in ac, whereby no one is a one-man show, no one knows nothing about studies, and no one is so badly led astray. in mg, it's sad yet privileged that we are really sheltered from all vice and diseases. therefore jc would be a mega step towards the real world. yet, ac is still relatively sheltered, something that i'm glad about. i'm not implying that i'm not mature or not ready for the outside world, but it's more of i want to take it slow. yes, between jc and secondary life, there is a wide river of lava. you either cross it well and survive the cross-over or you fall into the pit and get melted/dissolved. thus, how you treat your jc life or simply what jc life offers you truly determines your future.
i'm proud to say i feel more AC than MG, in the sense that the AC spirit is a lot more stronger than MG spirit, which is something i've taken granted of. i always thought it is the same in every other jc.. the rafflesian spirit or the 'once a saint, always a saint'. but it proves otherwise after my convos with my darlings. maybe it is a biased point of view, but it holds some truth and can also be identified in many events. i don't really want to go into too much details cos you never know who's reading my blog. thus this generalized sweeping comments.
we moved on discussing about the new friendship bonds as well as how much our old friends have changed so much that we grew more distant from them. again, i'm quite happy that i've found my new clique in class (yup, you know who you are) and most of my besties have too found their own cliques in their respective schools/classes. a thought struck me then. how about the other friends made in AC? are they really friends or mere acquaintances? for me, it would not matter so much because it's always in me that it's better to make more friends than foe and i'm the kind who would like to keep in contact with most people. yea, therefore whether a friend or an acquantiance would not make much of a difference long as i've my close friends around me and i would just treat everyone a friend to simplify matters A LOT!!! (: another school of thought of mine: why bother to think so much about a relationship? you have nothing to lose just more to gain when you have more friends. yup!
regarding how people have changed, there's always positive and negative sides. well, DEBO.. you are mentioned in here! well, you have changed for the better.. from a sheryl who is in your school and from my deference of your posts in your blog. he's a good guy yeah. you've become more mature and less whiny (yay!). yup, so just stay together yeah! (: yeah, although you might not be enjoying yourself so much in there, always think on the bright side: you have him and you have us (awwwwww..). you know we were so sad you can't join us yesterday! just hope that you can hang out again after OP and your stinky chinese AO. heh.
negatively, yeah, there's this person in particular but i don't really want to mention. it's not that bad, just a similar mindset shared by all my friends. just keep it among us, yeah?
i kinda realized that whenever we had a a2 bestie outing, i'll always have something to post. and i read back my previous post, i realized that my mindset changed a HELL LOT. the previous post was about how everyone's struggling to fit into the jc system, into our own class, finding our own cliques. but now, after a couple of months, when our j1 so-called relaxed life is coming to a close, we have all matured and learnt and integrated or (a negative word) disillusioned into the jc curriculum. jc life never allows time to reflect. j1 has just gone in a flash and i was very very very disappointed with what i have achieved academically. should i have been more of a mugger? are my study methods ineffective? have i really neglected my studies and took the As too lightly? well, such thoughts definitely run in most people's minds, especially when most of us have done horribly. well, just wanna say to all (as well as myself): sorry! too bad! it's too late to regret! hah! *lol. so mean* but hey wait, what we can do now, is realize our mistakes.. seriously looking through our scripts and see where we have done wrong. have we been overly confident (which i have for math.. that was a major disappointment. i'm still.. sighing..)? talking about promos, yes. i've done badly if you are interested to know. it's really saddening that i might have to drop a subject but to quote from someone (hah), i'll "cling on the subject". i think the 4th subject really acts as a crutch for the fact that i'm doing Chinese A and my higher chinese/chinese AO is seriously of no use cos of the exam criteria. if i were to drop the 4th subject, i'll have to pass all 3 subjects and GP, which i still don't have the confidence in. well, if you want to know, my 3rd and 4th subject results are really different from my other 2. REALLY.
so much for random rambling.
i finally found time to listen to music again. lots of korean and into micheal jackson right now (thanks to jo's CD. mj rocks.) and i'm writing a short story. will post it after i'm done (: